Today is the first day in a very long time that I felt somewhat human. I got up at 8:30am and struggled to get my garbage can up to the road. I managed to order a few groceries, start a new knitting project and made myself supper. The sun was shining today and it looked like a nice day outside. My knees continue to be very bad, one worse than the other. It feels like it is spreading up my right leg and at times today I am getting a shooting pain in the interior hip area that causes me to buckle over for a moment.
I have so many appointments to make and emails to return but am not there yet. I do need to at least start tomorrow. I am in total avoidance state. I am not doing any therapy currently as I am supposed to call to set up with new therapist for EDMR. I did call there yesterday, however the person who answered said they have no access to schedule to set up appointments and they would call back in the afternoon. Of course no one called back. I need to call NP office to set an appointment with her and incorporate physio and blood work at the same time. It is very overwhelming to me if I am being honest. I have zero desire to go anywhere, see anyone or do anything.
I often feel like I should be over this by now or at least feeling a little more human. It is obvious that what has been done up to this point isn't helping. Maybe the new therapist is just what I need. Time will tell.
Oh yeah trial is not continuing until June ........
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